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| Me looking up at the tree I was under. |
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| Hi, Mr. Ant. |
Well, it's not like I didn't know that. I mean, I spent 28 days at Hazelden in Center City and 6 weeks in Hazelden's outpatient program in St. Paul (not to mention the AA meetings). However, today was my 90th day of sobriety and I almost gave it away this morning. Yeah, I don't get it either.
My wife has bronchitis and was prescribed cough syrup with codeine. I checked under her pillow to see if it was still there, even though she said she was taking it with her. Why? I have no idea. Luckily, it wasn't there. But, what if it had been? What if I had found it? Would I have taken it? I just don't know. I would like to think I would not have taken it. I haven't been having cravings or anything like that. I have learned that my mind works differently. From a clinical standpoint, I understand that I have a disease that I cannot control and that there are no medications that will help alleviate it. I believe what I have learned at Hazelden and in AA - the one thing that will help is through my relationship with my Higher Power.
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| Pretty Bee! |
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| Another Pretty Bee! |
My Higher Power is God. However, my God is not a human shape. My God is nature. Sometimes it is a bee. Sometimes it is spider building it's web. Sometimes it is a flower or the way the sun hits a tree. When I pray, I am having a conversation with the Spirit of all that is surrounding me. I have developed a stronger love of photography that I even had before because of my increased awareness of all that surrounds me.
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| Our place at sunset. |
I need to say my prayers now so I am calling it a night. I have decided to make my wife a gift for our first wedding anniversary (though we have been together almost 14 years). I am excited because I get to get my creativity out. YAY! I will let you know if she likes it.
In closing, I leave you with this thought from my
Caribou Coffee: "Be a hero, minus the dorky cape."
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